HELP #4

Well, this was one of those days we never got to the book. I apologize if that was inconvenience or annoyance but I am presuming we all felt necessity to explore some issues.

The discussion began by exploring our realization of how we are sometimes aware and awake and other times we are unaware or asleep. We all recognized the significance of this especially in the light of the intense extremes many of us are experiencing. For instance when we are asleep or unaware it is so easy to be caught up in fear and separateness and not realize that by our focus on these forms of negativity, we are adding to that anger and fear that we are attempting to avoid.

So two major areas arose are exploration: one was how do we stay more aware and awake; the second was what do I do when I awaken from a period of unawareness.

Let me approach the second one. 
I believe that a big part of our experience here on planet Earth is that we will go through periods of awareness and unawareness, the goal being to achieve that state of awareness fully. That is what some religions would refer to as enlightenment, or a continual state of the awareness of the presence of God. Translating that into a more personal terms, it would be a continual awareness of ourselves has love, as one with the divine. 

I’m going to use an image here from Jack Kornfield who was describing the process of meditation by using the term “puppy training.”

As you are training the puppy, you will notice that little dog will sit and obey for a few moments and then become distracted and go off on his own until you pick him up and put him back on the papers again. This is a great example of our wondering mind and our limited ability to stay focused or awake. And again well we are dealing with here is not being awake in the physical sense but essentially being aware and more especially being aware of the truth of who you are—a divine child of God, Love incarnate.

So here we are, sometimes recognizing this truth and sometimes not. When I lose my sense of awareness I become identified with a particular role I am playing or I become wrapped up and very emotionally involved in a particular life situation. At those times I am not aware of how trapped and limited my experience of myself is.

These times of unawareness can be very short or can last a long time. For instance, if I have become aware of my own impatience and if I react with annoyance towards someone who is moving too slowly, I might immediately stop myself and apologize. I have only slipped for a moment and that was because of my habit of impatience. In other words, I have what I call a “knee jerk” reaction to a particular situation. And once I have become aware of that and have the desire and willingness to change that pattern, I will become aware of it practically as soon as taken over my consciousness.

Now of course, there are still many blind areas in my life that I am not aware of or that I am only vaguely aware of. When those are triggered I might be unaware and perhaps unaware for a fairly long time.

Another poignant example of unawareness lasting for an extended period is that of an addiction. I do not realize nor do I want to realize that the addiction has taken over my life.

Now back to the question “What do I do when I wake up after a period of unawareness?”

What I have found happened to me is I would become aware/awake again and then I would have the tendency to beat myself up for falling asleep. Now with behaviors of that kind, the purpose or the intention is not usually self- punishment, it is usually an attempt to correct the situation, however this method never works. You see, the way the limited mind works here is by thinking “If I punish myself enough for falling sleep or becoming unaware then I won't do it anymore.” Interesting thought but totally false.

So here is another choice-when I become aware after a period of unawareness I can be grateful, I can rejoice in my awakening. Interestingly enough this method of gratitude is also an answer to the first part of these questions–“How do i stay awake more often?”

This might be a bit of a silly analogy but I was thinking that the soul might be quite reluctant to wake up if the only thing it is going to experience is getting itself whipped and  beaten.

If being aware is associated with qualities gratitude, wonder, and rejoicing it is certainly going to be much more attractive.

At this point in my life I might not always have a choice of whether I am aware or unaware, however I do have a choice of what I do within my awareness and for this I am thankful.


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